Desperation

Love doesn’t come out of desperation, period. -Chad Eastham

For most of us, I would assume, see this quote and think, “Of course it doesn’t!” But if we were to step back and take a look at our own lives, how many times have we so desperately wanted love that we were willing to do anything to get it? Whether it’s a dating relationships or even friendships, we long to connect with people. I can remember being so desperate for friends when I was younger that I became something I never wanted to be. I was desperate. I conformed to what they wanted me to be so that I could have the “love” and “companionship” of a group of girls. I’m glad I didn’t chose a different group of people or I would have really gotten myself into trouble. But now I see that true relationships and true love don’t come out of simply longing and conforming. They come from being the person that God created us to be. Real relationships come from God.

Just because we want something, doesn’t mean it’s good for us and when we search for relationships out of desperation we are simply setting ourselves up for failure. Have you ever noticed the people who date around and constantly have a girlfriend/boyfriend are also the moodiest people you’ve ever met? They are “happy”, that is, until they break up. Then they fall into this deep hole that they don’t think they can get out of until they get into another relationship. This is not healthy! They seek love out of desperation.

We are relational beings and that’s how God created us! But he wants us to have good, healthy relationships that come out of real love for each other; not lust, infatuation, or desperation. In reality, the only way to get our relationships on earth right, is to get our relationship with God right. Even then there will be issues, but with God there is hope!

Beauty

I recently asked some girls a question on facebook and wanted to share their answers with you! Our world constantly tells us how imperfect and plain we are but you can help change that. Here’s what some girls had to say.

What can guys do to make you feel beautiful and special?

“Standing up for you when another guy says something rude.” -Ivy

“For me, when my brothers and Dad give me a hug it definitely makes me feel loved and beautiful. It totally depends on the girl/love language, but when guys treat girls with brotherly love and respect and aren’t rude or perverted, when they build them up in Christ, ask what they can be praying about, etc.. it makes girls feel special/loved and beautiful in the right way. Its always nice to have someone tell you that you are beautiful, but it is potentially very inappropriate for a guy to go telling all his girl friends that all the time. haha I think this question is also contingent on whether you are talking about a dating relationship or a friendship. Because if you are in a relationship then a guy telling his girlfriend she is beautiful is totally appropriate. :-)” -Aubrey

“Geniunely caring when your struggling and just listening.” -Abby

“Just holding me when I cry-not talking or asking what’s wrong-just holding me and giving me a shoulder to cry on” -Brandi

“Noticing the natural parts of your beauty and saying it is always nice…rather than the comments that could be made about your jewlrey or the clothes your wearing.. sure those things make might make you feel good but I would rather hear about the nature beauty that every girl has :) … the parts that no girl has to try for.” -Stacey

“Being looked at in the eyes when I’m talking. That means the world to me.” Whitney

What do you think about what these girls had to say?

Devo 21

Joy doesn’t mean

Only Happiness. It means having a

Yearning for Jesus and living for HIM

Sometimes I think we confuse being happy, with true joy. True joy is hard to come by. We must fight for it. And the essence of joy is found in God’s arms.

“Therefore there is no more important struggle in the universe than the struggle to see and savor Christ above all things-The struggle for joy.” – John Piper

“God Himself is the ultimate object of our enjoyment” – John Piper

Joy comes when God is in the center of our world. When we strive for Him. Even when times get hard, we know that He loves us, He is there to give us strength!

God, I pray that we will go all in for you! That we will experience true joy through you!

Devo 19

This life will be hard. It will not always be easy, but you were made for it! So glorify GOD in everything you do! Trust in Him and keep you eyes focused on Jesus!

-His love is unfailing and everlasting (Jeremiah 31:3; Isaiah 54:10).

-If we seek Him we will find Him! (Jeremiah 29:13)

-He is the source of our strength. (Psalm 28:7)

-He is our safe place (Psalm 91:2)

In life, “There may be temporary strayings and backslidings. There may be great soul-conflict. But once the soul has truly tasted the water of life and the bread of Heaven, it will never forsake the Lord.” – John Piper

“We are so preciously loved by God that we cannot even comprehend it. No created being can ever know how much and how sweetly and tenderly God loves them.” – Julian of Norwich

-Kelly

Trust.

Whether you are in a dating relationship or a friendship, trust is essential in every aspect of life. Think about it. It’s the hardest thing to gain, but the easiest to lose. All it takes is for us to lie once, hide something once, break a promise once, or gossip once, and it’s gone. We can get it back, but it takes hard work and patience.

In a lot of dating relationships, people find it hard to trust their boyfriend/girlfriend. Recently, a friend of mine dealt with this situation. His girlfriend didn’t trust him, she was suspicious, thinking that he was hiding something from her when he wasn’t. He had never given her any reason to think he was being dishonest and yet, she questioned him.

There are times when we don’t trust, and the person has done nothing wrong. Could it be that we don’t trust because we are insecure in ourselves? That we lack self-confidence and assurance, sometimes needing (maybe wanting is a better word) the affirmation of another person (a boyfriend or girlfriend)? We want to hold on to them, but in the process get paranoid about losing them because we need someone to make us feel worth something.

People will mess up, it’s part of humanity. We have to be willing to forgive those who have broken our trust. Remember, we can always trust the Lord! We will never lose Him and we are worth so much to Him! How cool is that?!

Devo #13

I read this today and really started thinking about how I love people. If all I ever do in this world is love, then I have succeeded in my life! I have lived life to the fullest if I love as Jesus loves!

^“1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,  but do not have love, I gain nothing.

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”                                                                                    1 Corinthians 13

-Kelly

Devo number 3

What’s in love?

The definition of love in the dictionary is a strong liking or affection for someone or something. Now that is a very vague description of love, but the bible describes love in a much deeper way. In 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 it says “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

Now there are many different types of love but they all should have the characteristics described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

©     There’s love for your family

©     There’s love for you friends

©     And there’s the love God tells us to have for our enemies and our neighbors in Leviticus 19:18. “You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

©     There is also love for your spouse

©     Last and most important is God’s love. Which is never failing and it is the love we should be seeking the most.

It’s really hard to keep all of the things love is supposed to be in mind when you think of all the different people you love. Like with your siblings, you know you love them but it’s hard not to fight every once in a while.  Or with your friends, lots of times when one of them hurts us, we tend to keep track and hold it against them. Holding it against them is the same thing as keeping track of wrong doings.  Just keep the characteristics of love in mind next time your about to fight with your sibling, friend, boyfriend or girlfriend, your parents or even people you don’t like. We’re supposed to love them all with the love described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

Arielle

Valentines Day

Well guys, today is Valentines Day. I am at home, getting ready to eat lunch and then I’m gonna spend the day studying. How about you? Are you worried about what that girl is going to think of that valentine? Or how your girlfriend is going to react to what you have planned for today? I want to challenge you to take this day and think about what the word love actually means. I googled it’s meaning (I’m lame I know), and here’s what I got; a strong positive emotion of regard and affection. According to this, love isn’t necessarily just romance. I mean, I have a strong positive emotions toward quite a few people. For example, my brothers, my parents, my close friends, all these people I have strong feelings for but not in a romantic way. Show people you love them and care about them! = )

Today in church my youth pastor talked about what love is. His main point was that love is unselfish and self-sacrificing. Love, is doing what is best for another person despite what you want. So guys, if what you want to do this V-Day is going to hurt somebody, think about it first. Is it really love? If getting a hotel room is your plan then you don’t love her. Love isn’t having sex with her right now. That’s selfish. You may say “But oh, you don’t understand! We are in love!”  No, you’re not. Not if this is your choice. Sex outside of marriage is emotionally painful for both of you and doesn’t help anybody. True love is sacrificing your wants, to their needs. If you really care about her, you will resist your sexual desires in order to keep from hurting her.

If you are celebrating Happy Singles Awareness day instead of Valentines Day, then find some way to show the people around you that you care about them. Like I said earlier, love isn’t just romance.

Show people you love them by keeping their best interests in mind, and unselfishly caring for them.