Why?

23 03 2010

The other day I was talking to a man about my blog and he had a few very interesting questions/comments. He is a public school teacher and one thing he said he notices is that, a lot of times, the guys who are jerks, get the best looking girls. I guess I had always noticed that, I’ve just never put it into words. As I thought about it more though I realized how extremely true that is, and I questioned why that’s the way it is.

First off, the jerk guys usually stand out because they are obnoxious and loud. The nice guys typically aren’t obnoxious, haha that’s one reason they are the nice guys. These two types of guys are confident in two different ways. The jerks are confident in that, honestly, they are usually good-looking and they know it. They know that girls like them and so they flaunt it, flirt, and play with girls. They lack confidence is such a way that they feel like they need to be a jerk to get even more attention and to show off.  They know that since they are good looking they can get whatever they want from a girl, which might be true depending on the girl. I have noticed that really they just act like they have confidence. Pulling people down isn’t confidence, and maybe you have heard that. They feel like they need to bash others in order to feel bigger, whether they would admit that or not.

The nice guys are confident when it comes to the fact that they don’t feel like they have to make fun of people in order to to feel good about themselves. They aren’t cocky or obnoxious. They are considerate toward people, which makes them the opposite of a jerk. So why then, do the jerks get the good-looking girls? For one thing, I think the girls we are talking about here could be the same as the guy. They know that they are good-looking therefore they know they could get any guy they want and get anything out of him that they want. Girls can be very caddy, meaning we can be very mean gossips who care way to much about what people think of us and what we think about other people. As you all know girls are known for talking……A LoT. Not all of us are big talkers but a lot of us are. So we bash people too, it’s just in a different way. Maybe these girls just want a shallow guy to give them what they want and vise versa.

If you aren’t one of the jerks maybe you are jealous of the attention these types of guys get and you wonder what the point of having standards is, or if it’s worth being nice to people. Well, it is. You will save yourself so much heartache and pain if you hold out for the right girl and put your effort into a good relationship. These girls and guys no depth in their relationships for the most part and it’s usually all physical stuff.

I am still trying to work through why the jerks get good looking girls. Especially because I wouldn’t ever want to date a jerk. But really, how much of us having this opinion is just that we see the popular people who get what they want and influence others? Not all good-looking girls go for the jerks, and not all good-looking guys are jerks. If you have any comments on why you think this is, post a comment for me!

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2 responses

24 03 2010
Adam

This is a thought provoking post. Thanks for sharing. I did some research and some thinking…I hope this helps identify the “Jerk” upfront so that girls can avoid a dating relationship with one: 

Jerks are self-centered and don’t show respect. They only think of themselves. They aren’t afraid to walk up to a girl and talk. This isn’t a bad thing, in fact, I think girls are attracted to that (something the nice guy needs to learn how to do, but in a respectful way haha) because they think he cares. But if the girl rejects the jerk then he thinks something is wrong with HER, not him. 

Jerks come across as fun, interesting, and even exciting at first because they aren’t worried about offending anybody. They will talk about whatever and anything. Too many girls mistake this as “confidence.” And the nice guy can seem boring to the girl because he is afraid to talk with the her for fear of rejection. 

Most jerks “lust” instead of “love” over the girl. They only think about themselves. “True Love” is “not rude or self seeking…”, 1 Corinthians 13.

Again, I hope this will help some girls avoid dating the “jerk” by identifying him upfront. You still need to pray and seek wisdom about it too before making a descision.      

25 03 2010
Danny

This can rly help guys and girls think about what type they are. The jerk or the nice guy/girl. I like this post greatly I hope u post another =]

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