Why? (part 2?)

28 03 2010

On my last post called “why” I was trying my hardest to try to think through why the jerks get the good-looking girls and what a jerk is. Well, on that post a got a comment from one of my guy friends. Here’s the comment:

“This is a thought-provoking post. Thanks for sharing. I did some research and some thinking…I hope this helps identify the “Jerk” upfront so that girls can avoid a dating relationship with one:

Jerks are self-centered and don’t show respect. They only think of themselves. They aren’t afraid to walk up to a girl and talk. This isn’t a bad thing, in fact, I think girls are attracted to that (something the nice guy needs to learn how to do, but in a respectful way haha) because they think he cares. But if the girl rejects the jerk then he thinks something is wrong with HER, not him.

Jerks come across as fun, interesting, and even exciting at first because they aren’t worried about offending anybody. They will talk about whatever and anything. Too many girls mistake this as “confidence.” And the nice guy can seem boring to the girl because he is afraid to talk with the her for fear of rejection.

Most jerks “lust” instead of “love” over the girl. They only think about themselves. “True Love” is “not rude or self-seeking…”, 1 Corinthians 13.

Again, I hope this will help some girls avoid dating the “jerk” by identifying him upfront. You still need to pray and seek wisdom about it too before making a decision.”

Man, that sums it up so well! He basically said everything thing that I couldn’t get out of my brain on the last one. In the beginning he says something about defining a jerk so that the girls reading this won’t date them, but I think that the guys should look at this just as carefully. Think about which one you are.

I think he also makes a good point when he says:

“Jerks are self-centered and don’t show respect. They only think of themselves. They aren’t afraid to walk up to a girl and talk. This isn’t a bad thing, in fact, I think girls are attracted to that (something the nice guy needs to learn how to do, but in a respectful way haha)”

And…

“Jerks come across as fun, interesting, and even exciting at firstbecause they aren’t worried about offending anybody. They will talk about whatever and anything. Too many girls mistake this as “confidence.” And the nice guy can seem boring to the girl because he is afraid to talk with the her for fear of rejection.”

As awful as this may be…he is 100% correct. The jerks do come across as fun and exciting, and the nice guys can seem somewhat boring. BUT please, please, please! Do not let this discourage you! You don’t have to be the boring nice guy. Like “Scott” says, nice guys need to learn to talk to girls and have fun hanging out with us but in a respectful way, avoiding all of characteristics listed above.

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